Amrita Week 16; The Beauty of a Mundane Life
The Beauty of a Mundane Life
I always find myself crying over the lives of strangers.
Let me explain. In sophomore year, I experienced an existential crisis. What caused this at the ripe age of fifteen? I don't know. But the lost, directionless, fifteen-year-old version of me found herself filled with thoughts about the value of life, hard work, and whether anything was worth something at all.
What was the point of pouring my blood, sweat, and tears into any task I undertake, trying my hardest to get good grades and shape a future for myself despite having to try twice as hard as my classmates seem to be trying for the results, what was the point of all of the stress, the overthinking, all of it, if I was just going to end up living a life where all my days feel the same.
My biggest fear in life, bigger than any fear of heights, or the dark, or snakes, is the fear of living a mundane life. The fear of slaving myself away to a nine-to-five desk job that I hate, coming home to a house that looks the same as every other house on its street. The fear of living in a city that nobody has heard of where the scenery does not change no matter how far you drive. And I guess that, at fifteen, I was afraid that every ounce of my hard work would result in that kind of life.
As this existential anxiety grew, I began to observe the lives of those around me. As I watched adults play with their children in parks, cashiers ring up customer after customer, or even my mom, as she threw herself into her work, too exhausted to make dinner on some days, I thought about whether these people were satisfied with their lives. Is playing with your child in a random park in the random city of Fremont, California, or billing the items of nameless strangers, one after the other, fulfilling? And to my mom, is waking up at 4 A.M. every day and diligently following the same exhausting routine as the previous day fulfilling?
The thought of these people working their lives away to end up living unsatisfying lives often brought me to tears.
A moment of clarity brought on the realization that my existential view of the world was, in fact, not how most people think. The parents playing with their child in the park love their little family, the cashiers love the small daily interactions, and my mom loves me enough to persevere through the exhaustion each day to support me.
I thought about the streets with the houses that I can’t tell apart. I thought about how each one of those houses holds a story and a family, and how that family holds individuals with their own stories.
I thought about how the people in my life, and the love and compassion I feel make each day special.
I liked how you chose to discuss a recollection of the way of thinking you used to have and how you overcame it. I have also wondered a lot about what the true meaning of life is in the bigger picture of the world. Like you, I also used to think about why it even mattered to put in any hard work or get good grades. I came to realize that not only is it because of the compassion we have for the people we are surrounded by, who push us to be the best version of ourselves and motivate us to persevere for them, as you emphasized throughout your blog, but also due to the fact that nothing in our lives truly matter in the grand scheme of things. Therefore, as you mentioned, it does not matter whether we have mundane lives that do not contribute much to the world around us; it solely matters whether we are happy with our lives or not. I appreciated the insight that your blog gave me into a thought that was interesting to you, and I thought your blog was especially well-structured, with short and easy-to-read paragraphs, and had concise language.
ReplyDeleteAmrita, I was drawn into reading your blog with the shocking yet intriguing hook you began with: “I always find myself crying over the lives of strangers.” As strange a statement it might have been, you followed up with an explanation that deepened the meaning of your hook and segwayed into a passionate and insightful discussion of your fear of the dystopian, mundane lives that most people seem to have. It’s an incredibly relatable fear, as a life with no real meaning or purpose doesn’t really seem like a life at all. Yet, I really enjoyed how you portrayed these little, ‘mundane’ things as being the purpose and meaning itself, realizing that “the parents playing with their child in the park love their little family, the cashiers love the small daily interactions, and [your] mom loves [you] enough to persevere through the exhaustion each day to support [you].” Life doesn’t need some grand, groundbreaking purpose—the things we do for love are meaningful in themselves. Moreover, no matter how similar things may seem on the outside, there are no two things in this world that are exactly the same. Even in every dull and repetitive house, there is a different family dynamic, different people with different likes and dislikes and hobbies and fears, and a different lifestyle. Overall, I really enjoyed your blog and the message you had to send, and thank you for all the blogs you’ve written over the year and everything we’ve been able to learn from them!
ReplyDeleteHi Amrita! From the beginning, your blog caught my eye especially with the way you opened it. I certainly related to several aspects of your blog, the main one being fearing this "mundane life" you speak of. I often like to tell myself I will not allow my life to ever get boring. I intend to seize every moment and not allow life to be an endless loop where I work this "nine-to-five desk job." Of course, hard work will not always be easy, but the rewarding feeling at the end of an accomplishment is something I yearn for, and I believe it has the ability to make life all the more interesting. The way in which you recuperated with the statement "the people [your] life, and the love and compassion [you] feel make each day special," which is admirable and a thought that I will certainly keep in mind the next time I think about the possibility of this "mundane life." Thank you for your blog!
ReplyDeleteBefore I start commenting on your blog I just wanted to say that Amrita. Thank you so much for being here this school year. I know that you haven't really spent much time around AHS, but I really hope that you stay around for next year. I really enjoy talking to you and being able to banter about whatever is going on (OMG DHS DRAMA AM I RIGHT). But seriously thank you so much for being a friend this year and being kind to me. I'll really miss you over the summer and I hope that we can have classes together next year. Now onto your blog. I think that you bring up a really good point. One of my least favorite things to think about is a boring life. Seriously, why else do you think I always do all this random stuff to entertain myself. I mean sure I'm weird, but I think it's interesting to be different, although some people find it annoying. I love the way that you write by the way, it feels so real as if you are holding a conversation rather than writing to an audience you don't know. Anyways thank you so much for being here this year. I hope you have the best summer ever and I really do hope that you can do whatever your heart desires to do. See you next school year!
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